I love Billie Holiday

All of me, take all of me. Can't you see I'm no good without you?

Interesting.

Sometimes I think that people are trying to make me feel crappy.
Someone tells me how much they miss me and shares their feelings.
I think I feel worse than I would if I actually missed them back.

In thought

I find myself thinking about the future a lot as of late.
Will I be happier then? Will I make people happy?
Anywho, I also contemplate whether or not I could be a "success story" or whatever you'd like to name it. I am afraid that I won't be because I might just never overcome anything fully.

God's Been Watching

I think I am losing my best friend and I think it's my fault. Well I can't control everything.

Scriabin

Dudes, I will like him for his death.
He had a good one.

Composers I don't like: Fairy Man, Fugue Man, Four Seasons Man.

Cleaning

So I am basically purging. Purging if you could projectile vomit crap from your room, that is. Three bags of garbage, and two bags for Good Will later and I am still not done. I was able to get rid of my cheaply done and assembled end table for more room. Soon, soon I will paint. And everything will be new.

During my travels through nostalgia and confusion, I did uncover some interesting things...
1. At 9, I believed that if I practiced enough, I could develop "mind powers" and create things like invisible force fields. How do I know? I found an instructional guide to creating "walls" written by my younger self. Apparently, if you work hard, you can create a wall that looks like a "purpleish clear force field". I was so ahead of my time. To practice developing wall powers, it is recommended you get someone to throw erasers at you.

2. Someone was wise enough to write "Live Tomorrow" pretty much everywhere in the collection of 11-year-old stuff. I suppose this could be misconstrued as wisdom from my youth. It encourages you to keep living and whatnot, that life goes on. Really, I though that would be the name of my band.

3. Teeth. Why the fuck have I found THREE TEETH?

So with a few more days of labour, I will have a new room that is mine and to-the-point. On a serious note, this is probably inspired by the fact that I am getting old. We are heading into the last year of school, soon to move out. I think I am trying to burrow further into my childhood home. Oh well.

Woof.

I tell myself I am not a dog.
People seem to think that I am.
Sometimes I forgot I'm not.
Still not a dog.

Everybody Loves You

I'll get away from you darling
I'll get high hopes
God's been watching
Said, "leave that man alone."
Cause everybody loves you
Everybody loves you

So listening to one song over and over hasn't quite lived up to my expectations of summer. Bleh, damn you Limoges; everyone seems so far away. For here am I sitting in a desk chair. Hmph. Frustrations of living in an isolation station.

I think I know why people write in blogs. They put little pieces of what would be their diaries online. As anyone with a diary won't admit, we keep 'em around in the hopes that the right person would read them. However, since we are comfortable sharing these little personal snippets with our fellow bloggers, it can be assumed that they are not the "right person" and blogging just becomes a seemingly ineffective way of communicating anything, really.

Blehhh. I am not allowed to have a job this school year. There go my fiscal plans. But the parents say that I could get one on weekends for the second semester if I do well in school. I guess my hands will always be smooth as balls (DT reference, my bad).

I used to lay awake in my ship cabin, in the dark, next to Alex, in separate beds of course, and don the persona of Borat. Turns out, he just wanted to sleep and not talk to Borat. But I'm getting to the point which is I have perfected the accent. I can now disguise myself as a hopeless immigrant.

Ooh! A text!

JE SUIS ANGLOPHONE

Good riddance, french. Although, I desperately hope I don't lose my sham of biligualness, I am glad to be no longer stuck on grammar concepts. Did you know I went through the whole year thinking that when writing in past tense you could never use passe compose and therefore only use passe simple? The joy, the joy. And to think I survived without getting through the first act of Zone.
I have no idea how to act around females. I feel like I come off as a lesbian stalker or something. I was fortunate enough to get a ride home and my reaction is to invite my friend in to see my dog. Then I told my dog we could go out for Limoges cuisine if she wanted. (eye contact was difficult). I need social skills.
ALSO I AM A FREE CRAZY WOMAN MOTHER UCKAS!
With no more image to maintain I refuse to be hot and itchy any longer.
(Potential segue into STD creams...)

Be You the Shriveled Sweet?

So, today I failed at making cupcakes. Well, in the cupcake tower (literal one- not a metaphorical one of cupcake hierarchy-but that too) my cupcakes would be on the bottom. Nice and sturdy, good support. So not exactly a full failure. Stout little things with dark bottoms, what can I do.
So tomorrow is Relay for Life (hence the cupcakes)- OH I just killed [another] mosquito- and I am still not packed. What do you pack for a no-sleeping sleepover? I'm still confused. Mosquitoes lurk, surely in the corners.
Phillip, I value your ideas. I mean, it was sketchy when you told me my eyes reminded you of helms and you refused my definition (that being "helm is a type of helmet") but the group does need to...regroup. We're big. Not saying that it's time to downsize or consolidate but we should get in touch with each other. Or as Eric would say, "Nous nous toucherons"
I will now spend the rest of my free evening thinking about how I can make youtube video scripts based off anglophones' mistakes on french pronunciation and wordage. Hmm..wordage is apparently a word, more ya know.
Well, time for me to skidaddle, pack my guitar so I can pretend I'd fit in around a bondfire when really I'll be hiding in a tent tomorrow night.

Creativity Blooms.

So, my dry spell of creating nothing forever has ended.
Well, sorta one last triumphant spasm. It should end soon. I've been stumped after 2 chords and 3 lines. And all I can seem to talk about is dead fish. And physics. My WoW account ended. I am fast deteriorating. Toodles.

Interestink.

My basement smells like a thousand litter boxes.
I haven't checked my online in over a week, nor have I done any homework.
I just missed last week of school.
The next three days should be exciting.

'Bout Time

How can you expect things from me when you're never there?
How can you expect me to be interested when you don't bother to ask?
How can you continue to call me yours when you just expect me to wait for you while you do shit?

I understand that this is an angry post. Some might venture to say bitchy. But I'm grumpy and vomity and bleh. Take that world.

Homophobes.

Why is it that if someone of the same sex thinks you're gay, they automatically assume you will hit on them because they belong to your preferred gender? I don't live in fear that straight guys will hit on me all the time.

Hrm

I have been forced to draw the conclusion that some people just enjoy knowing that they have absolutely no redeeming qualities. cough*people on my bus*cough.

You say you have so many people to call, but do I?

I miss y'all, I really do. Perhaps I should express it in poem? Later.

Oprah on Menopause- Lyp Hussan

So I sit here, holding the dying torch that is our group's blogging and delaying the inevitable. Some would argue it is sleep, I would retort with the fact that my chemistry lab needs to be done..meh, I'll do it in online. I know that at least TWO people here are not blogging in fear that they will sound like someone who complains and blah blah blah. I will end this! I will talk about things you don't want to actually read about! I will complain! I will remind you that I've taken this time out of my busy schedule of procrastination!

Dear, this is worse than that time with the empty Goldfish bag and the DD breast implant.

So, my room is a mess. I came home and it was smelly. With some strategically placed Bounce sheets, I have it under control. Soucy reminds me of the main character from Basic Instructions and I can't find chaotic enough music to not get bored after the first chorus. Life is tough. We even missed a party opportunity as there is a Hindu holiday at the end of March. I will find one. I will force y'all to party and it will be grand.

Bread doesn't have calories so eat up but don't forget to floss.

mon frère

He's funny and he's smart and he's cooler than every other kid his age. I love the kid.

In the meantime, I must don the guise of a Confucian. Hrmm. I wish Madame wouldn't make us do so much work..but I do enjoy teaching classes with Mayhew- apart from the raging that occured about 4 hours ago.

Blah. I need inspiration.

Ein Problem?

The problem is not that there are many of you, it's that there isn't a whole you.

Oh the joys of knowing that tomorrow entails returning to school and that you are the only active blogger as far as you can tell.

Guess

FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU

Down To What?

I am happy you are happy.
And I hate you for that reason.

In other news, Sarah went to a party. A real party. Where there were drunk people and Jersey Shore die-hards. What was she doing there? She doesn't know either. She was quite entertained though.

Oh dear

It might destroy me, but I'd sacrifice my body if it meant I'd get the Jack part out.

SEE JACK
RUN JACK
SEE JACK
RUN JACK
SEE JACK
RUN JACK
RUN

=D

iBlog

So, this is where I insert witty comments and observations about the day. Here is where I complain about how cool the group used to be and how people need to comment on the stuff I write. This is where I give updates on my friends' lives if I've run out of my own as I most likely live as a hermit in my room. This is a comment that is somewhat snippy but often misinterpreted. Now I remind you that you should pronounce "often" as off-en. I don't know why, some guy made a list. (Pronounced liss) His name is probably Barry. I now fret about the new semester.

This is my blog.

Hrm?

So all y'all are blogging about the semester that is more or less over. Entertaining. And Lyp Hussan is still mad. Everything I eat is coated in a fine cheese dust (Party Mix) but someone has eaten all the Doritos and pretzels (Alex). Now over analyze that and stick nature and convention in that statement and you might be worthy of wearing thick-rimmed square glasses. I have nothing to say.

BUT WAIT
I FOUND A PRETZEL
AND A DORITO

So I figure I'll tell you about my brilliant plan to win a Nobel Prize. I overheard two people talking about dog booties and thought to myself, "This is ridiculous. Dogs don't need dog booties otherwise their ancestors would also need booties." Then it dawned on me. Maybe wolves need booties too. No one can tell if they have cold feet as they happen to not just share that sort of information with a random passer by. Thus, I enlisted a small group of people to assist me in giving the majority of wolves- and any stumbled upon coyotes- booties. Only a matter of time before PETA starts noticing my altruism.

Free Time? NO.

You'd think I have free time because I spend so much on the internet. BUT NO. I was working hard...hardly working.
GUESS WHO HAS 10K/TRAIT FIGHTING STATS ON TORN CITY NOW BITCH!

keeping ur emotions bottled up

So, as an 11-year-old prepubescent girl who liked Nickleback and romcoms, I decided to start a blog. Five years later and it has still been awarded no comments. That and it is filled with foreshadowing of future things to come. Ahaha, I was so...cute. I really shoulda written more because now the stuff is gold, I tells ya. Not doing so was a bad idea.

Not Picking Sides

So I get to hear the ex complain about a guy.
I get to hear the guy complain about the ex.
I'm expected to pick sides.
And I have.
I've picked my little brother.
But now two people can't shut up. Why does the ex even care who I befriend? He said he could never love me. Why does someone care about the ex he said he never valued as anything?
Hmph.
Being this irresistible was a bad idea.

I am Popular.

I was told "fuck you" by two different people tonight.
One of them threatened to beat the shit out of me.
I love him too.
Oh, and my feelings are being waited on. I'M NOT GOOD WITH FEELINGS!
So now I have multiple men to deal with in the morning.
Zach told me that when life is quiet for a while, it'll pick up and shit'll happen.
I agreed with him but I didn't expect it to come into effect within a few hours.
I blog because no one is online and Nathan keeps telling me that he is going to bed.
And that I should sleep.
After the last few texts I've sent.
Fiddlesticks.